Everyone knows that being a parent can be tough sometimes. But it doesn’t have to be that way all the time. We can make a conscious choice to be a happy parent.
We have already come this far. We carried the baby for 9 months, went through child birth, and whichever age your child is right now, the best option is to really make it count by moving forward as a family. If you are a dad, no worries. We moms know you have done just as much as we did to get to this stage.
Free ourself and our children from the world’s negativity – from the sources of ignorance telling us what we can and cannot do – by promising to look ahead, to live ahead, and to get ahead for our family.
Repeat after me…
I promise not to hold the past against myself.
Whether we like it or not, our parents’ parenting style affects us. But we are not them. We can choose what we like about their parenting style and ditch those that we don’t quite agree with. We are the parents now.
Our pasts, our weaknesses, regrets and mistakes teach us if we’re willing to learn. So let them teach us, every day. Take everything as a lesson learned.
If you regret some of the parenting decisions you have made in the past, stop being so hard on yourself. At that time, you did your best with the knowledge you had. At that time, you did your best with the experience you had. If you were to make these decisions with the wisdom you have today, you would choose differently.
So give yourself a break. Time and experience has a wonderful way of helping us grow and learn to make better choices today, for ourselves and those we care for.
I promise to keep the smile on.
When times are tough – like when your child throw an epic tantrum in the public or the children get sick one after another, take a moment to pause and see the beauty of your child. Take a moment to reflect on the things that have real and lasting meaning in your life, like our family and the legacy we are leaving for them. And then smile about how far you’ve come.
No matter how long it takes, it will get better. Keep going. Tough parenting situations build strong parents.
Nothing in this world is more beautiful to your child than his/her parents’ smile. Honestly, it could also be quite terrifying especially if they expect you to get angry. It may surprise them into stopping their unacceptable behaviour at that very moment.
I promise to own my life and never deny responsibility for it.
Our children learn everything from us. So if you want them to grow up to be a responsible human being, start owning up.
These days, especially on social media, I see many people with statuses that blame their parents, their child’s teachers, their neighbours, the education system and the government. Have you caught yourself doing that? Have you blamed yourself? It’s never, ever your fault… right?
WRONG!
It’s always your fault. Because if you want to change, if you want to let go and move on with your life, you’re the only person who can make it happen. It’s YOUR move to make. It’s YOUR responsibility. Own it!
I promise to be a parent that feels right to me, not one that looks right to everyone else.
Give yourself permission to raise your child YOUR way. Realise that some people in your life simply won’t approve no matter which stance you take in parenting; it clashes with the their perceptions and that’s OK.
Trust that you know what is right for your child. Always have an open mind to what others have to say. But essentially, it is you and your children who will have to live with the parenting choices and actions that you make.
I promise to take time out for myself once in a while.
An old Chinese proverb says ‘If you want your children to be successful in life, instead of catching fish for them, teach them how to fish.’ Independence is a very valuable life skill that children need to learn without having you around. Instead of being there and rushing to their aid all the time, it is more beneficial for children to be allowed to tackle some tasks on their own. So you go ahead, take some time off and do what you want to do.
Remember that you and your spouse were a couple first, before you became parent. Taking time out from the children allows you both to be yourself, not just a parent. It rejuvenates the bond between you two. The bond you need as a team to endure the endless challenges together as parents.
Remember, happiness is both contagious and hereditary. Happy parents have happy kids.
PS: For more happiness tips, download my report of 7 mistakes highly stressed moms make.
Agree wholeheartedly with everything you've shared in this post. Being happy is a conscious choice and I can choose to be a happy mum so that my kids can be happy kids! 🙂
Agree wholeheartedly with everything you've shared in this post. Being happy is a conscious choice and I can choose to be a happy mum so that my kids can be happy kids! 🙂
wooohooo I love to keep the last promise! 🙂 It would definitely make me happy!
wooohooo I love to keep the last promise! 🙂 It would definitely make me happy!
Totally agree about the me-time! I'm still learning the right balance to spend quality time with my girl and doing other things like housework while she play independently.
Totally agree about the me-time! I'm still learning the right balance to spend quality time with my girl and doing other things like housework while she play independently.
You've written it out for all of us! Thank you 🙂 especially of taking ownership!
You've written it out for all of us! Thank you 🙂 especially of taking ownership!
Love this post! Totally agree about Me-Time and making a choice to be happy! Thanks for this reminder!
~ Audrey @ SAys! Happy Mums
Love this post! Totally agree about Me-Time and making a choice to be happy! Thanks for this reminder!
~ Audrey @ SAys! Happy Mums
I like the one you wrote about taking responsibility for personal happiness. It's too easy to push the blame onto others.
I like the one you wrote about taking responsibility for personal happiness. It's too easy to push the blame onto others.
Ok. Gotta remind myself to love myself more so that I can be happy. Always seem to be frowning nowadays ????
Shirley @ SAys! Happy Mums
There are often many voices about how I raise my children but I have to stay firm. PersonAl time aside is also important although I feel guilty at times . 🙂
Such a great post! I do find that it's a constant struggle not to let other people's opinions or suggestions define or away me in my parenting, so this is a good reminder for me. Also, it's so true that a happy parent makes for a happy child. 🙂
Such a great post! I do find that it's a constant struggle not to let other people's opinions or suggestions define or away me in my parenting, so this is a good reminder for me. Also, it's so true that a happy parent makes for a happy child. 🙂
Certainly. Mind over matter!
Have you scheduled your next 'Me-time', Jiahui?
Thanks Deb. Happiness is our own to take. Never put it into someone else's hand.
You are not alone, Phoebe. I still feel guilty at times. But think of it as shaping independence for the kids, we are doing them a favour! 😛
Wonderful concepts presented here! Thanks for sharing with #SocialButterflySunday! Hope to see you link up again this week 🙂
Have you scheduled your next ‘Me-time’, Jiahui? 🙂
Thanks Deb. Happiness is our own to take. Never put it into someone else’s hand.
You are not alone, Phoebe. I still feel guilty at times. But think of it as shaping independence for the kids, we are doing them a favour! 😛